“You can live extraordinary or extra ordinary. Ultimately, it’s all in what you decide.”

I’ve been thinking about that sentence a lot lately.

Maybe because lately I’ve found myself looking around at my life and thinking, How in the hell did I get here?

Not in a bad way.

In a* "there was a time when I never would have imagined this would be my life"* kind of way.

And the older I get, the more I realize that an extraordinary life doesn’t necessarily belong to extraordinary people.

It belongs to ordinary people who keep making decisions that take them somewhere different.

There’s a difference between living extraordinary and living extra ordinary.

One is a life you actively participate in.

The other is a life you simply get through.

And I think I’ve spent time living both.

Extraordinary Rarely Feels Extraordinary While You’re Living It

A few weeks ago, I was in South Africa.

South. Freaking. Africa.

Even typing that still feels a little unreal.

And the craziest part?

I probably never would have gone there if it weren’t for my daughter.

Elaina earned the opportunity to represent Team USA and compete at Worlds, and suddenly this South Texas mom who never would have randomly decided, You know where I should go? Africa, was figuring out passports, international flights, luggage, competition equipment, fundraising, travel plans and how the hell we were going to make all of it happen.

There were plenty of reasons we could have said no.

Money was a huge one.

Fear was another.

Traveling that far from home wasn't exactly inside my comfort zone.

There were a thousand little logistical reasons why staying home would have been easier.

But she earned the opportunity.

So we figured it out.

We raised the money.

We packed the bags.

We got on the plane.

And suddenly I was standing on the other side of the world watching my daughter compete for Team USA.

We went ziplining.

We got lost in the Maze of the Lost City.

We spent time poolside.

We experienced a place not on a bucket list on the other side of the world.

And somewhere in the middle of all of that, I realized something:

Sometimes your extraordinary life is hiding behind a decision that would be much easier to say no to.

The Same Thing Happened With My Camera

Photography has been part of my life for a long time.

But there is a huge difference between loving photography and deciding, I'm actually going to build something with this.

Building Cassandra Dale Photography has required me to make decisions that scared me more times than I can count.

Putting my work out there.

Charging for it.

Walking into businesses and photographing people who trusted me to represent their brands.

Showing up at powerlifting meets and figuring out how to capture athletes in a way that actually feels like them.

Taking on commercial work.

Learning video when photography was what I knew.

Standing on a job site photographing and filming one of a company's biggest installs while trying to look like I absolutely knew what I was doing—even when part of my brain was screaming, Girl, what have you gotten yourself into?

There have been mistakes.

There have been jobs that taught me exactly what I never want to do again.

There have been times I've undercharged.

Times I've overthought everything.

Times I've compared myself to photographers who have been doing this professionally much longer than I have.

Times I've questioned whether I was actually good enough to build the kind of business I see in my head.

But then something happens.

A company sees my work and wants me.

A parent tells me what a photograph means to them.

An athlete sees themselves differently because of an image I created.

A brand notices something I photographed.

And I realize none of those things would have happened if I had waited until I felt completely ready.

Because I still don't feel completely ready.

I'm starting to think nobody ever does.

Ordinary Is Comfortable

There's nothing inherently wrong with ordinary.

Ordinary can be safe.

Predictable.

Comfortable.

But there's another kind of ordinary.

The kind we accidentally choose when we keep telling ourselves:

Maybe later.

When I have more money.

When the kids are older.

When life settles down.

When I'm more confident.

When I know what I'm doing.

When I'm less scared.

I've said versions of every single one of those things.

And the problem with waiting until life settles down is that I'm starting to realize...

Life doesn't settle down.

Something is always happening.

There's always another bill.

Another responsibility.

Another problem.

Another reason why right now isn't the perfect time.

If I waited for my life to become perfectly organized before doing anything scary, I'd probably still be waiting.

Sometimes Extraordinary Looks Nothing Like Success

This is something else I've learned.

Choosing extraordinary doesn't guarantee that everything works.

Sometimes you take the chance and fail.

Sometimes you spend money and regret it.

Sometimes you take the job and realize you weren't prepared.

Sometimes your kid works their ass off and the meet doesn't go the way they dreamed.

Sometimes you put everything you have into something and still don't get the result you wanted.

That doesn't make the decision meaningless.

Because extraordinary isn't about winning every time.

It's about participating in your own damn life.

It's being willing to find out.

I'd rather know I tried than spend years wondering what would have happened if I had.

My Life Doesn't Look Like I Thought It Would

And maybe that's my favorite part.

If you had shown a younger version of me pieces of my life today, I don't know that she would have believed you.

That I'd own a photography business.

That I'd become so involved in powerlifting that gyms and athletes became some of my favorite people to photograph.

That my daughter's sport would take us across the country and eventually across the world.

That I'd stand in South Africa watching her represent the United States.

That I'd find myself photographing commercial projects, athletes, businesses and people with stories worth telling.

That I'd be learning videography.

That I'd be writing a blog.

That I'd still be figuring things out as I went.

None of it happened because there was some perfect plan.

Most of it happened because somewhere along the way there was a decision:

Do it or don't.

And enough times, I chose do it.

I Don't Want to Watch My Life From the Sidelines

There are still plenty of things I want to do.

Places I want to see.

Stories I want to tell.

Things I want to create.

People I want to photograph.

Experiences I don't even know exist yet.

And I'm sure I'll screw some of them up.

There will probably be more failures.

More uncomfortable conversations.

More wrong turns.

More moments where I question whether I've completely lost my mind.

But I would rather have a life filled with stories about the things I tried than a life filled with explanations for why I never did.

I don't want to spend my life waiting for permission to live it.

So, Which One Are You Choosing?

Maybe extraordinary doesn't mean becoming famous.

Maybe it doesn't mean becoming rich.

Maybe nobody else even notices.

Maybe extraordinary is simply building a life that makes you stop every once in a while and think:

Holy shit. I actually did that.

Maybe it's getting on the plane.

Maybe it's watching your child chase a dream bigger than you ever imagined.

Maybe it's starting the business.

Maybe it's changing careers.

Maybe it's walking away from something that no longer fits.

Maybe it's saying yes before you've figured out every detail.

Maybe it's starting over.

Maybe it's finally deciding you're done waiting.

Because we're all given ordinary days.

Tuesday mornings.

Bills.

Laundry.

Work.

School schedules.

Dishes in the sink.

Responsibilities.

The same 24 hours everybody else gets.

What makes a life extraordinary isn't escaping the ordinary parts.

It's what you decide to do in between them.

So take the trip.

Apply for the opportunity.

Start the thing.

Pick up the camera.

Say yes when every part of you wants to hide somewhere comfortable.

Let yourself fail occasionally.

Let yourself change direction.

Let yourself discover just how much bigger your life can become when you stop requiring yourself to know exactly how everything is going to work out before you begin.

You can live extraordinary or extra ordinary.

Ultimately, it's all in what you decide.

And as for me?

I think I'd rather collect the stories.